.:!Spin Out Of Control!:.

[.:*Hawkstar*:.]

There, high on the watchtower
Keeping the peace
Whatever that means
Because you see the world through
Crosshairs and TVs don’t you

Ten foot walls built around us
White picket death
So quiet, so safe
But if we fall there will be nothing and no one to catch
Sit back and watch as we

Spin out of control
Spin out of control
Try to recover, but collide with each other
We spin out of control

~Rise Against

A dark tabby figure lurched from sleep, panting, still too dazed to know what was going on. In her panic, she raced from her den shared by no one. Her paws thundered against the ground, the she-cat to desperate to escape her nightmare to realize the loud noise. The lithe figure pelted from the safety -or danger- of her Clan and out into the forest that was pitch black. The wails of the dream continued to echo in her head.

They were only kits... screaming... The brown tabby shook her head wildly, slowing her pace until she was only trotting. Breathe, Hawk; you can't panic and think at the same time. It was only a dream. But, her heart continued to pound, the blood roaring in her ears like an angry lion. She stopped, sitting down and drawing her tail around her trembling body.

"Only a dream," she murmured aloud. "It was just a bad dream." If only she could believe herself.

Her pale green eyes slithered around, her gaze taking in only the black shadows cast by the looming pines and patches of moonlight that shone bravely through the trees. Everything was silent, almost too silent. It allowed the noise of the she-cat's dream to return.

The blood-curdling screams of she-cats and the wails of kits in distress sounded faintly in the back 'Hawk's' mind. Wild hisses erupted from toms, their blood spilling as they fought to protect the next generation. Some she-cats were battling as well, their bellies slim -a sign that they were not mothers. Every cat bore long claws, sharp teeth, and curled tongues as they hissed. Their eyes were narrowed, their pupils slits. Everything seemed red -red as blood. Even the sky was bleeding, orange clouds snaking across the surface. Trees were outlined black against the poor light, the sandy ground blotched with red puddles.

Everything whirled, sickening the tabby. The fighting cats had vanished, along with the hollow they were in. Now, everything was dark, a full moon glittering in the sky. Below the powerful rays, two cats were outlined. One was large, the other small. Green eyes glared at violet. A dark tabby stood defiantly against a solid gray.

Me and Gray, Hawk realized in horror. She had seen this before.

Suddenly, the solid gray tom lurched forward, knocking down the little tabby she-cat. Wait, that's not--! But it was. The gray cat hurriedly found the throat of the tabby, crushing her throat with the force of his powerful jaws. She wailed, blood spurting from her mouth and neck, as she batted at the tom's body. She tore open his belly, clawed up his shoulder and chest. But it was useless; her thrashes became weaker and weaker, her sight hazing. She was dying.

The dark tabby shrieked, recoiling against the soft ground of NightClan territory. She body rattled, her eyes so wide that one could see the ring of white around her irises. Her fur fluffed out as her body curled against the forest floor. Her claws flew out, tearing into the soft earth.

This was Hawkstar, leader of NightClan, her once powerful figure collapsed in her own home. Fear could almost be seen radiating from her coat. All heir of power had fled from her, leaving a trembling mess of fur. She sat in shock, rattling, jaws parted in a silent wail, with her claws out as if she were actually fighting. It hadn't happened like that. No, gray had never bitten her throat. She was still alive, wasn't she?

Why had she dreamed of her own demise? Why was it by her once-beloved mate, Gray?

How could he have killed her, when he was already dead?

[*Beechstar*]

Whitefire awoke from a deep sleep, hearing paws thundering against the clearings hard earth. She gasped, then shut her mouth, trying not to wake Hawkstripe. She slowly padded out of the den, not feeling sleepy at all. She scented the air and smelled a mix of fear and Hawkstar. She decided to follow the scent, which lead her out into the forest.

She found the tabby she-cat, sitting with her back to the tortoiseshell, clawing at the ground and in a state of pure shock. Whitefire walked around her, so she could face the she-cat. Hawkstar's face was frozen with fear, mouth slightly open. Whitefire quietly said, "Hawkstar? Are you alright?"

[.:*Hawkstar*:.]

Hawkstar nearly had a heart attack when she was interrupted in her fear by Whitefire. Without thinking, the leader cat hissed and lashed out a paw, just barely missing Whitefire's ear.

"Whitefire..." she murmured, drawing back weakly. "I'm sorry. I'm not feeling well tonight. I... I had a nightmare that really got to me..."

Sitting up to her correct posture, Hawkstar's eyes glided around the clearing. "Did anyone follow you?"

[*Beechstar*]

Whitefire ignored her leader lashing out at her. She looked around and scented the air. "I don't think so. Hawkstripe was still asleep when I heard you and left." She then looked her leader in the eyes, forcing her to make eye contact. "Is there anything you want to tell me? It always helps me to share my feelings when something scares me."

[.:*Hawkstar*:.]

Hawkstar stiffened, her claws sinking into the soft earth. Talk about it?

"Uh, well," she started, sounding unsure, "I'm not really sure how it went, but it started with a cavern, maybe like a Clan Camp? Anyways, there were screaming kits and queens, and there were thin Warriors hissing and swiping at something... Everything was red, like blood, and there were already dying cats and puddles of blood everywhere. But then, it all changed." The NightClan leader shifted her gaze up to the moon. It was shining proudly, showing off its pale color. "It was me and my old mate, Gray. We were standing a fox-length apart near a shore or something. He lunged at me and bit into my throat. He killed me in the dream."

The she-cat took a deep breath, lowering her gaze back down to her Warrior. "But that couldn't have happened. It couldn't have, because I killed him."

[*Beechstar*]

The tortoiseshell listened closely as her leader explain her dream. Whitefire closed her eyes and pictured the horrid dream, everything flashing and changing as Hawkstar told it. When the leader finished, she opened her eyes. She turned and made eye contact with her leader. "That must have been horrible! Now I know why you're fretting so much. Is there anything I can do to help?" She pondered the question, not thinking there was anything.

[.:*Hawkstar*:.]

The dark tabby shook her head slowly. "No, it is fine. I've been dealing with the guilt for long enough to take it in. Maybe it was just karma, coming back to put me through what I put him through. You should go back and rest," Hawkstar added suddenly. "You shouldn't be stressing over me when your kits are so close. It's unhealthy."

hauling herself to her paws, the she-cat slowly began to pad away, her steps so drawn out that her hips swished. "I'm just going to walk and cool off some, maybe get a drink. I'll be fine." The tabby flashed a weak smile over her shoulder. Then, turning away without an answer, the slow pattern of the swishing walk returned.

[*Beechstar*]

Whitefire nodded. When her leader got up, she did also. She wasn't very sleepy now, but a nice, cool drink from the river sounded nice. She started after her leader and caught up with her. "A drink sounds nice. Plus, it might make me more sleepy." She smiled. She knew that her leader probably didn't want her to come, but she would anyway.

OOC: She should probably have her kits soon... but we would have to have Lavapelt be there...

[.:*Hawkstar*:.]

OOC:: Yeah...

Hawkstar grimaced as she heard the paw steps following her. She needed time alone! But, nevertheless, she plastered on a soft smile. "Alright," she murmured.

I wonder why she didn't react to me telling her that I killed someone. The dark tabby cast a side-glance at Whitefire. Maybe she understands? No, no one understands. They all just look at you as a killer. They don't...

One of the streams that raced through NightClan territory came into view, and the leader cat approached it. Crouching down, Hawkstar's pink tongue flicked over the surface, lapping water into her warm mouth. It was freezing cold, drawing out a relaxed shiver as it slid down the tabby's throat. The bitter thoughts slowly began to creep away from her body. The cold water slowly began to numb the bad.

[*Beechstar*]

Whitefire walked alongside Hawkstar towards the river. When they were in within eyesight of the stream, she ran forward. She quickly lapped up some water and quenched her thirst. She started walking back towards camp, not waiting for her leader. She was tired and wanted to get back soon. If Hawkstar wanted walk with her, she would catch up.

While she was walking back, Whitefire thought about how she knew that Hawkstar had killed another cat. She didn't really mind it; she had probably had a good reason. And even if she didn't, the tortoiseshell didn't mind. It wasn't her life.

[.:*Hawkstar*:.]

Hawkstar cast a side glance at her warrior as she made the motion to leave. "Hey, Whitefire, she called awkwardly, "thanks." You don't know how much you have helped me tonight. Sure, all we did was talk, but you understood me a little. And for that, I thank you.

A smile found its way to the dark tabby's lips.

Once Whitefire was out of site, Hawkstar decided that it would be best to get some sleep herself. She had a long day ahead of her and it was stupid to be sitting out here, scared like a lost kit. She was a leader.

Now, this was Hawkstar; Leader of NightClan, and proud of that fact.